Today is our anniversary of waiting 3 months to be chosen by a birthmother. I haven't had too much contact with our agency. I've mostly just been waiting for the call, but I did get a concerning email from the agency about a week and a half ago. I had emailed them to check to see how everything was going and they responded by saying that several birthmothers had viewed our portfolio, but none had expressed interest in us at this point. However, they were concerned about our China adoption because they thought it may be upsetting to the birthmothers to know that we were also had another adoption pending. The strange thing is that we had put our China adoption on hold and had told out domestic agency that. Even if we hadn't put our Chinese adoption on hold, we still would have a 4 year wait period to be placed with a child and our domestic agency knew that, too. Anyway, I didn't think too much about it. I just figured that they had forgotten about the hold, which is ok, everyone gets busy. However, the more I think about it, I'm becoming concerned that when they introduced our portfolio to the birthmothers, they mentioned the Chinese adoption because there's no other way the birthmothers would know. As we are not pursuing the Chinese adoption, it's not in our portfolio. So I called the agency today to talk to them about this and clear everything up, but our case worker is out until Friday so I'll have to wait for that call back.
The wait has been ok. On the bad days I just keep reminding myself how short our waiting period has been. It had only been 1 month, then 2 months, and now we're at 3 months. But mostly I don't think about it too much and I don't get down about it very often. It's actually been a pretty content and happy time for me because I finally have a sure thing to look forward to. I've had a few friends tell me that they are trying to get pregnant, are pregnant, or are about to have babies recently. Before, this news would have killed me. It was so painful and while I was very happy for my friends, I would drown in self-pity at every announcement. But now, I feel like I know that I'll have a baby in the next 9 months, too, so it's exciting to receive news from friends because I know that I'll have friends with kids around the same age.
Anyway, we are ready. We are so ready that I feel like we're leading a life that has a big "insert baby here" sign stamped on it.
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